Why I Should Have Waited to Marry

Should I Have Waited to Marry?

Marriage advice will usually tell you that “marriage is hard work”—and with my first marriage, I certainly found that to be true.  Keeping up with my husband’s demands were exhausting. Trying to be the wife he felt I should be was a lot of work, and I’m sure that he found I was similarly demanding. Read More

Since My Divorce: Learning and Growing

Since My Divorce: Learning and Growing

Divorce is a life changing event. It’s also an opportunity: to learn more about yourself and grow into the person you were meant to be. My divorce and my post-divorce situation have been one of the most difficult trials I’ve had to go through. But I like to feel that I’ve taken the pieces of Read More

Bringing Your Emotional Baggage into Your Next Relationship After Divorce 1

Unbacking Baggage Before a New Marriage

When I first remarried, a co-worker of myself and my husband remarked, “your husband must be very patient if he’s willing to take on you and your children.” I found the comment incredibly insulting. Granted, I was a bit of a wreck after my divorce and the car accident but my husband and I have Read More

Riding the Rollercoaster - Co-Parenting with Disneyland Dad 1

Coparenting with Disneyland Dad

I know I’m not the only one who feels like I’m failing in the popular parent contest.  My ex constantly takes the kids to theme parks, buys them cool toys, and in general, lines himself up for parent of the year by bribing the judges.  Do you ever feel like you’re co-parenting with Disneyland Dad? Read More

Coparenting: Splitting Expenses without Losing Your Mind

Coparenting: Splitting Expenses without Losing Your Mind

When our divorce decree allowed for splitting expenses for our children in half, I thought it would be easy. All things being equal, with two kids, half means I pay for one kid and he pays for the other, right? So mid-January I received notification that it was time for our biannual payment for “pizza Read More

Kids Spending the Summer With The Ex? 7 Survival Tips

Kids Spending the Summer With The Ex? 7 Survival Tips

I’m now at day 15 of what will be a 16-day period without seeing my kids. They’ve spent the first part of summer with the ex. No surprise—the Goblin King was again difficult with vacation this year, but it does appear to have worked out in my favor. Once they’re back, I’ll have almost a Read More

Waiting for the Piano Plane 1

Waiting for the Piano Plane

Although I often wish he was out of the picture, I would never, ever actually take action to remove my ex from my life. I know how much it would hurt the children. But there are days when I get wistful. Days when he’s stretched me to the limit and I have no outlet but Read More

Shared Custody, Pennies And How I Get The Most Out of Spending Time With My Kids

Shared Custody, Pennies And How I Get The Most Out of Spending Time With My Kids

When considering divorce, a major deciding factor is sometimes the amount of time that you get to spend with your children.  After all, you only have approximately eighteen years together (more or less) – and after divorce, you might suddenly find that you’ve reduced your time by half (depending on your custody agreement).  In my Read More

A Divorced Mothers Worry: Do My Children Need Therapy?

A Divorced Mothers Worry: Do My Children Need Therapy?

It’s a commonly held belief that all children of divorce need some psychological help. It’s not always true – but as a divorced mom, it is something that I’ve thought about. Read more – see my article at DivorcedMoms.com. Follow Live by Surprise on Twitter, Google+, Facebook, Pinterest and Bloglovin.

Why I Should Have Waited to Marry

America Needs Paid Maternity Leave

This past week, you may have read about an multi-national corporation called Vodaphone who’s making a bit of a stir by offering all of their employees at least 16 weeks of paid maternity leave.  In addition, they’ll be offering flexible work hours to employees returning from leave.  All employees.  Including Americans. Which is fantastic – because the US continues Read More