Okay…okay. I know that I said I’d always be open and tell my kids the truth when it came to sex and their questions.
But kids sometimes ask questions that you don’t expect – right?
My niece was up this week (my sister lives out of state and she comes for a week or two in the summer). We were eating watermelon and she said – I used to think that a watermelon would grow in my stomach if I ate the seeds.
That was me. I told her that. When she was about four, I may have even pointed at a pregnant woman and told her that’s what happened.
It’s OK – she never ate the seeds. So she didn’t sit up nights wondering if she was growing a watermelon. I swear.
OK. Not my finest moment.
Regardless…sometimes we just do that. As aunts. As mothers. We may fudge the truth to amuse ourselves.
As I also did this week with Flower.
OK – this part is going to get slightly graphic. I’m going to give you the chance to turn off.
Still with me?
Are you sure?
Here it goes. So Flower and I were in the mall and I had to (just had to) go to the bathroom. As Flower is only six – I don’t like to leave her outside the stall if it’s really busy (and this was the downtown mall, not the nice burb mall we usually go to). So I made her come in with me. Of course…I was on my period and instead of just jabbering away and looking elsewhere – Flower happened to see that there was red in the toilet. She didn’t ask about it – she just said – Oh mommy, your pee is red.
We were in a mall bathroom mind you. A not very nice mall bathroom either.
So I just said, Well look at that, yes it is. OK. Let’s go wash our hands.
And it worked. She let it go. That was about a month ago.
Until last night. She came into the bathroom as I was on the toilet. (I don’t know why I can’t go alone. It would be nice to go alone for once.)
Mommy – remember that time when your pee was red? How did you do that mommy?
Really? Can you get a better opener?
I couldn’t resist. She didn’t ask why it was red. She asked how.
So…I told her that red was my favourite colour that week. I like purple sometimes, and green. There was that one week I did blue. But it was red that week.
Her eyes got pretty big. Really? How did you do that?
Why – can’t you do it? I do it all the time.
So of course, she’s trying to get me off the toilet to see what my favourite colour is this week.
I think it’s just yellow this time. Sorry – it’s been a long day. I was too tired to think about it.
And of course, we’d been to the beach that day. And I hadn’t changed since I got home. So as I get off the toilet, in addition to the yellow – there is sand on the bottom.
Oh my mommy. I guess you weren’t that tired. Look – sparkles!!