A Blogiversary/Love AAF with DJ Lindsay Klein

I  know…I’m posting early – AAF is Ask Away Friday…but give me a little leeway – today marks one full year since the date of my first post.

I’ve learned a lot in the past year about blogging, about community – and most importantly about myself.  I feel a lot more confident about writing.  I’ve worked through a number of issues I was struggling with related to my ex.  And I’ve made a lot of friends.

I’ve always believed that once you get to the top (yeah, I know, I’m a long way from the top…but I’m also a far way from January of 2014) – you should send the elevator back down.  So today, I am welcoming a brand spanking new blogger to the blogosphere and providing her first introduction to one of the communities that welcomed me the most – Ask Away Friday.

Everyone provide a warm welcome to Lindsay Klein – because (in case you didn’t know),
Lindsay Klein Rocks!!

Okay…so Lindsay has actually been blogging for a bit – she’s showcases her writing abilities on the website for the Radio Station she works at, WDHA-FM.  Her new blog has been active for just over a week now – she introduced herself, and since then she’s talked about trusting the universe, her own anniversary – teaching yoga, and viewing our bodies as a garden.As Lindsay recently got hitched, we decided to go with a Valentines/Love Theme. And you can follow Lindsay on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram (watch for her amazing yoga pics!!)

What is #AskAwayFriday? Have you been hiding under a rock?  Well…#AskAwayFriday was created by the amazing Penny from Real Housewife of Caroline County as a place for bloggers to connect and learn about other blogs.

Our wonderful #AskAwayFriday hosts…

Tamara from Tamara Like Camera (and the lovely Lindsay’s sister!),

Tiffany from Mrs. Tee Love Life Laughter,

Christy from Uplifting Families,

Stacey from This Momma’s Ramblings

Echo from The Mad Mommy

And now’s the part I love the best.  I answer the questions that Lindsay has asked me (and you can check out Lindsay’s answers to my questions here):

It’s been one whole week in the blogosphere!! I know I have a lot to learn as a new blogger, but I also just can’t wait to see how it grows. Do you find that you’re where you thought you’d be when you started blogging?  Or did you imagine it going a different route.

It’s very unlike me…but I actually had no set plan when I started the blog.  I was off on mat leave, and just decided to try it out one day.  I read a few articles on blogging, figured out what social media accounts I needed, hit on a “brand” and a mission – and set off on my way.  I didn’t even tell anyone about it, not even my husband.

About a month or so in, I discovered DivorcedMoms.com, applied to become a writer, and here I am now – a Featured Contributor at DivorcedMoms and I’ve even had a few articles featured on HuffPost Divorce.  This year I plan on stretching a little farther – possibly submitting to some of my favorites – ScaryMommy, Midlife Boulevard, What the Flicka, StigmaFighters.  We’ll see how it goes.

What are your favorite things about blogging, and what do you struggle with?

I think my number one favorite thing about blogging is the community.  I’ve found so much support out here – support I could have used while I was going through the darkest parts of my divorce.  Even though I didn’t have that support at the time, my readers have been very helpful as far as providing advice or even a sympathetic ear.

As I wrote earlier this week, I’ve been struggling lately to find a balance between upholding the values I hold dear and the continued frustrations caused by the Goblin King.  I really do want to be a good co-parent.  But there are days when I really just feel like a good purse brick would come in handy.

I’m finding it hard to just get through the day in 2015 juggling a few jobs, husband, and technology.  How do you handle your time management in writing a blog, reading other peoples’ blogs, and still getting everything done with your own life?! I definitely need advice here please!

I don’t sleep.

Just kidding.  Since I’ve gone back to work, I’ve definitely had to shift some of my priorities.  I still have a fairly active blog presence – but I’ve limited my posting to two days a week.  I’m also not as active as I’d really like to be on social media.  I limit my social time to in the car on the way to/from work and after the kiddos are tucked in bed.  To make up for it, I’ve been using some great mobile tools for scheduling posts including the BufferApp.

As for the commenting, I also typically do this when the kids have gone to bed – or instead of reading the morning paper.  I always make time for my favorites – and Bloglovin has become a helpful tool to keep me from missing anything.

Since it’s almost Valentine’s day, are you a lover or a hater of the holiday?  Do you bring it into your home with your children?

I’m ambivalent.  The conception of the “holiday” was very commercial in nature.

That being said though, the kids do get store bought Valentines and prepare them for their friends – and I typically will buy each of them a small gift.  Hubs and I will also exchange a small gift and a card.  His Christmas gift from me this year was tickets to the Opera the weekend after Valentines – when I don’t have the older two.  I actually just arranged an overnight sitter today…so hopefully it will turn into a nice dirty weekend.

Hubs also gets excited about the celebration of anti-Valentines on March 14.  You might not have heard of it…but I gather Steak and BJ Day is gaining some traction…

I know you are a very strong divorced woman, how do you deal with the stress from the “goblin king” (p.s. great movie reference!) ?  Do you have any goals on being able to “deal” with him? Of course I suggest yoga!

My ultimate goal is to get him to realize I’m not the enemy.  OK.  I guess it’s less of a goal than a dream – because it’s never going to happen.  I do use relaxation techniques, deep breathing (yes, like I learned through years of practicing yoga), and I have tons of family support lined up for when I have an issue – whether it’s picking up the kids because he’s being an ass or reading an e-mail so I don’t say something I shouldn’t.  I’ve set up some strict boundaries – and I try to abide by them.  He still frustrates me – but it’s easier now than it was a couple of years ago, and I’m hopeful that it will continue to de-escalate as the kids get older.

I read that you would like to zip line one day?  I can fully tell you to DO IT!  It’s amazing and such a rush!  Do you have any other extreme sport bucket list to do’s ? In fact, can you tell me five bucket list dreams of yours?  If you don’t have one, it’s time to make one!

I’ve actually zip-lined before – my sister lives in BC and we did it out there.  It’s probably a lot more amazing than the local zip-line – but I’d still like to take the kids.

I don’t know if I’m into really extreme sports – but I’d like to go snorkeling in the tropics again.  I did an Eco Park in Mexico with my ex and it was just beautiful.  I think the kids would like it.

I did white water rafting in BC as well – but I’d love to go to Colorado for another try.

There are oh, so many places I’d like to travel.  Egypt.  Greece.  Turkey.  Spain.

There is a large river about an hours drive from here – and there’s a company that offers lazy tubing trips.  They drive you up the river, and drop you in with a tube and some sunscreen.  You lazily wind back down to your car.  They even have special cooler tubes you can rent and tow behind your tube so we can have a picnic along the way.
I’d like to do that with the kids.

 And, as this year I’ve finally learned how to (almost) fold a fitted sheet properly, so my goal is to figure out how to stuff a duvet cover (That was really pathetic.  But it’s something I need to know).

Do you find a constant theme in your blog posts? Do you try to keep any patterns with when you post, and what it’s about?

I’ve picked Monday and Thursday as my regular posting days.  I try to do an #AAF at least once a month (I just did one with Bev on the 7th…but the opportunity to be your first popped up so here I am again in January).  I’m going to try and get on Cascia Talbert’s list for February – but I missed when she joined (again with the not so active on social media), and I may have missed that boat (any one looking for a February date??)

I did my first Sunday Confession last week at More than Cheese and Beer – but I’d like to do another.  And at some point I’ll stop in for Friday Feats and Fails too.  But for the most part, I post what I feel inspired by that week (and sometimes that day).

My “theme” is my life.  I think my life story is pretty unique – but facets of it seem to touch my readers.  I just post about whatever I find interesting that day.

I’m in love with the movie High Fidelity so here’s my little five part question!!
a. top five records of all time:

I don’t know if these are the best records of all time…but I do listen to them regularly..

  1. The Beetles – 1

  2. Jason Mraz – Love is a Four Letter Word (I especially like his cover of Rocket Man)

  3. George Michael – Listen without prejudice

  4. Madonna – Like a Prayer

  5. U2 – Rattle and Hum

b.  top five moments with your children of all time:

  1. The day I found out I was pregnant with each of them.

  2. The day they were born.

  3. Florida in 2011.

  4. Every night at story time.

  5. The day I remarried.  The kids walked me down the aisle.  I was so proud.  Even when Flower got to the end of the aisle and announced loudly to the room that she had to poop.

c.  top five foods of all time:

  1. Chocolate

  2. Dutch croquettes

  3. Dutch stroop waffels and pannenkoeken (hand made at the market in Holland)

  4. A nice steak sandwich on a not too hard but not too soft bun with french fries and onion rings

  5. As of yesterday, my new fave is a hand made hamburger topped with brie, gouda, bacon and onions

d.  top five places you would like to visit:

Whoops…kind of answered that one…but top five specifically?

  1. Cardiff, Wales (have to have the Doctor Who Experience on my list somewhere – Tamara is watching even from Florida)
  2. New Orleans (hopefully this year!!)
  3. Tenerife in the Canary Islands
  4. Gallifrey or Raxacoricofallapatorius (you didn’t specify non-fictional)
  5. The UN Visitor Centre in NYC (truthfully, I had fantasies since I was a young girl about working at the UN).

e.  top five romantic fantasies:

You’ll be surprised, but Steak and BJ Day doesn’t make the list.  I’m not sure how to do this without writing a novel, so I’ll just give you scenerios (and note that this would be role-playing and the man I’m picturing is my husband):

  1. Tropical Island
  2. Pool boy
  3. My office desk after hours (NOTE:  have never done this and would get fired if caught, so no actual plans, even for March 14th)
  4. Woman alone at a fancy bar picked up by man she doesn’t know
  5. Shower (yes – I know this particular fantasy doesn’t work in practice – still does it for me.)

I know you are currently married and your ex sounds like a monster, would you go back and change marrying him if you could, or do you accept that this has been your life’s journey, and you do have wonderful children!?

What makes you just utterly happy?

What a great question!  Bae has been sick pretty much constantly since he started day care.  We were actually at the hospital this week and he was diagnosed with “pre” pneumonia (and likely asthma).  It was a very long day for all of us – and as we were waiting for Hubs to come back from the pharmacy, I lied down with him on the bed.  He started hacking something awful – so I sat us both up so he could catch his breath and maybe just fall asleep on my shoulder.  He looked at me, pushed at my shoulders and made me lie back down so he could lie back on top of me.  I let him lie back down on my chest, he stuck his finger in his mouth, relaxed and stopped coughing.  He was almost asleep by the time Hubs got home.

Having my child sleeping on my chest makes me happier than happy.  Something about the warmth and the way their hair smells.  It’s better when he’s not sick – but the fact that was the only place he wanted to me brightens my days.  Even if he still can’t say mama.

So…as it’s my blogiversary – I’d love it if you’d let me know you stopped by in the comments.  Tell me what makes you happiest!!

And don’t forget to check out Lindsay’s answers to my questions and follow her on FacebookTwitter and Instagram!

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