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Bringing Your Emotional Baggage into Your Next Relationship After Divorce 1

Unbacking Baggage Before a New Marriage

2017-05-22
By: Live by Surprise
On: May 22, 2017
In: Divorced Moms, Featured Posts
With: 5 Comments

When I first remarried, a co-worker of myself and my husband remarked, “your husband must be very patient if he’s willing to take on you and your children.” I found the comment incredibly insulting. Granted, I was a bit of a wreck after my divorce and the car accident butContinue Reading

Not all wounds are visible: Insights into marriage with a narcissist 1

Moving Past Narcissistic Abuse and PTSD

2017-04-17
By: Live by Surprise
On: April 17, 2017
In: Divorce
With: 8 Comments

“When you leave, he’ll invent stories about you.”  The narcissist in my life started inventing those stories long before I left.  He couldn’t take the blame for anything, so logically, everything was my fault. As much as I like to think that I’m out from underneath the abuse, I stillContinue Reading

Do My Children Need Therapy? A Divorced Mother's Worries

Do My Children Need Therapy? A Divorced Mother’s Worries

2015-12-01
By: Live by Surprise
On: December 1, 2015
In: CoParenting, Divorce, Parenting
With: 7 Comments

Do my children need therapy? I have to admit, this is something I’ve struggled with.  I’ve had extensive therapy since leaving their father – and it’s helped me a great deal.  I’ve been able to reflect on why I married their father, why I stayed married for almost ten yearsContinue Reading

Coparenting: When Back to School Means Back to Conflict

2014-09-22
By: Live by Surprise
On: September 22, 2014
In: CoParenting, Divorce
With: 1 Comment

The problem with negotiating a “one-size fits all” parenting agreement is that it’s impossible to anticipate what types of changes the children are going to experience as they get older.  The after summer transition to a new grade can be particularly trying as both parents try to adapt to newContinue Reading

Our Story: Marriage "After" Divorce

2014-07-03
By: Live by Surprise
On: July 3, 2014
In: Divorce, Marriage
With: 2 Comments

My divorce was long, difficult, and messy.  We’d discussed finalizing the paperwork, but my ex outright refused to pay his half.  “I’m Catholic.  I don’t believe in divorce.” Yeah.  Catholic.  Right. Anyway – everything was done except for the decree.  I didn’t have the piece of paper that said IContinue Reading

On Losing a Family Member

Preparing Your Kids for the Death of a Pet

2014-03-26
By: Live by Surprise
On: March 26, 2014
In: Parenting
With: 1 Comment

When my husband and I were dating, I met his kids well before he “met” mine. He had joint custody of two gorgeous dogs – Montana, a full Rottweiler, and Apollo, a German Shepard Rottweiler mix. Montana was about eight at the time, and Apollo was about eleven. I sayContinue Reading

Merging Households

Merging Households: 5 Ways to Make Common Financial Goals

2014-02-11
By: Live by Surprise
On: February 11, 2014
In: Marriage, Parenting
With: 0 Comments

Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links. One of the failings of my first marriage was our approach (or rather lack thereof) to managing money. I admit freely that I did not have a mature understanding of budgeting, and my ex, although he was much older than I, had learned toContinue Reading

Every Day is a Gift 1

Every New Day is a Gift

2014-02-07
By: Live by Surprise
On: February 7, 2014
In: Inspiration
With: 4 Comments

Those of you who have been reading my blog know that I’ve been in a bad car accident. My leg was broken rather severely. My femur was split in two—I have a big metal rod inside it now that knit it back together. My knee cap was broken into fiveContinue Reading

When Should you Teach your Children to be Independent? 1

When Should you Teach your Children to be Independent?

2014-02-01
By: Live by Surprise
On: February 1, 2014
In: Motherhood, Parenting
With: 0 Comments

I face a continual struggle with my children’s birth father with regard to parenting techniques.  I work very hard to foster their spirit and independence and self-confidence.  My ex doesn’t understand because that isn’t the way he was raised.  He works hard to ensure the children are dependent on him,Continue Reading

I'll Love You Forever 1

I’ll Love You Forever

2014-01-25
By: Live by Surprise
On: January 25, 2014
In: Motherhood, Parenting
With: 1 Comment

Over each of my children’s beds is the quote from Robert Munsch’s most popular book: “I’ll love you forever, I’ll like you for always, As long as I’m living, My baby you’ll be.”   A reminder for each of them.  At the beginning and end of each day. If you’reContinue Reading

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1 2 Next
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    Value the Air You Breathe
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    Book Review: “Just Tell Me I’m Pretty”
  • Unpacking Emotional Baggage - A Love Story
    Unpacking Emotional Baggage – A Love Story
  • I Almost Had a #MeToo
    I Almost Had a #MeToo
  • Normal Coparenting...vs Me
    Normal Coparenting…vs Me
  • I'm Pivoting on a Rubber Band: I'm Afraid to Snap Back
    I’m Pivoting on a Rubber Band: I’m Afraid to Snap Back
  • Fight or Flight: Embracing my Gray Hair
    Fight or Flight: Embracing my Gray Hair
  • #NaBloPoMo - The Best Galleries and Museums in the World
    The Best Galleries and Museums in the World
  • I Would Have Loved Paris in the Springtime...but... 1
    I Would Have Loved Paris in the Springtime…but…
  • I Blinked...And You Turned Ten 1
    I Blinked…And You Turned Ten

Lola's books

Doctor Who: The Forgotten
Star Trek: The Next Generation / Doctor Who: Assimilation2, Volume 2
Doctor Who Classics, Vol. 1
Doctor Who: The Eyeless
Chronic Profit: Building Your Small Business While Managing Persistent Pain
Doctor Who: The Slitheen Excursion
The Other Emily
Tracing Your Ancestors in Lunatic Asylums: A Guide for Family Historians
Memories of Tomorrow
The Mercy of Snakes
Red Rain
The Praying Mantis Bride
Photographing the Dead
In the Heart of the Fire
The Painted Girls
The Other Typist
The Woman Who Stole My Life
Great Shape Hunt, The
Zoe's First Book of Seasons
Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas: Zero's Journey Issue #0


Lola Marguerita's favorite books »

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